I told her how good it felt to hold her and comfort her. I took a long time doing it. Then I asked her to give me a hug back and she made me feel safe and loved, and it was wonderful. After a while she reminded me that she was still naked and that her breasts were leaking something awful. Next she told me to do what she was doing. She started by unbuckling my belt. One slow step at a time she undressed me then laid down on the bed beside me. Then she said it was my turn. I picked up. I poked his arm with my fist and said, "Hang in there. The rest of us did it, you can too." You don't know Karen," he whispered. "She would never dream of doing anything like this. Please go easy on her."I put my arm on his shoulder, and looked into his eyes. "I'll watch out for her, Tom, really, I will. You can count on me." Thanks, buddy," he said as he took my other hand in both of his. "Can I say something about putting her in your hands when I leave?" Sure, no problem."Oh, fuck, was this. Instantly my mind began racing, Dawn, the start of a new day. What a beautiful name. I immediately had visions of early morning sunrises. I could hear birds singing their morning songs. I could smell the sweetness of the early morning. Then reality kicked in.She was up here with two other guys and she had just been kind enough to help someone in trouble. What was I thinking? Where was that protective wall that I had been surrounded by for so long? I somehow managed to shake her hand and. "I looked up at him. "Please," I said quietly."Please what?" he asked."Please punish me," I answered."For what?" he asked."Because you can," I said. "Because I need it." But if it's just punishment for punishment's sake, that would be sexual," Jeff said."Yes, it would," I replied."And that is OK with you?" he asked."May I set the rules?" I asked.Jeff nodded.Rachel had told me the rules that she had set for Jeff. Rule one: no permanent marks. Rule two: he can't do anything that would make him.
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