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I’ve been sad the last few days. I don’t feel productive. I’ve been working about 10 hours a week. I did put in a full 8 yesterday. I hear people talking about their dreams and goals for the future and I can’t afford the pain of having any.When I wrote about being overwhelmed in the bank two chapters ago I didn’t mention that I was having full blown for lack of a better word dementia like symptoms. I knew why we were there but didn’t understand what was going on. I was arguing about what papers. No we don't have many executions; the last one was two years ago and it was a man who had stolen food."Paula was now crying and obviously panicked."Shut up," said Frank, "It isn't you. It's some new woman who evidently didn't want to be a whore and really preferred death. She bit half way through the prick of the first man who was tried to use her mouth, and he will die for sure soon because we don't have any doctors here who can treat things like that. It will turn septic and he will get blood. However Laura only hung around with them for friendship, the only time she experienced any thrills was when she got The Knife out and imagined it thrusting into human flesh. Sometimes she thought about it slicing into one of her friends' bodies but she knew her own belly was far more trim and elegant a target so that turned her on much more.?Playing with The Knife one evening when her parents were out she took some photos of her holding The Knife in front of her bare belly and posted them on. Have him come up while I jump in the shower."As she was opening the shower door, Eric walked into the bathroom. They hugged and kissed. "Honey, I'm sorry I wasn't up when you came. I didn't sleep at all most of the night." I'm sorry, Layla. I should have waited to tell you." No, you did the right thing. I'd have wanted to know as soon as you did." I'll start the coffee and breakfast for us if you want." That'd be wonderful. Fix anything you want. I'll be down in a few minutes."After showering.
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